What did Jesus say about forgiveness?

conflict

I suspect that we’ve all had times when we’ve been hurt or disappointed by others, and I suspect that we’ve all been taught many different things about forgiveness.

Some people expect us to “get over it” and move on with our lives as if nothing happened. Others confuse the concept of forgiving and forgetting. Still others want us to believe that people of faith are supposed to continually “turn the other cheek” and endure the hurtful behavior of other people. And still others tell us that there’s nothing wrong with holding onto our anger indefinitely even though some people describe holding onto our anger as drinking poison and waiting for other people to die.

I’ve put together a series of three short messages to help you to reflect upon forgiveness, and upon some of the things that you may want to consider when you’ve been hurt and disappointed by others. Times of hurt and disappointment do not need to end significant relationships – but times of hurt and disappointment need to be considered and handled in ways that are both honest and authentic before healing can occur.

In the first message, “Binding and Loosing”, we take some time to think about ways that we approach forgiveness immediately after we’ve been hurt or disappointed. Many folks want to forgive – or to be forgiven – quickly because the feelings and emotions that follow times of hurt and disappointment make us feel uncomfortable. But, did you know that it’s OK to hold onto your anger and to even withhold your forgiveness until after you’ve had some time to “process” what happened? Forgiveness can only be authentically given after we’ve acknowledged that the hurt and disappointment is real. Rushing the process of forgiveness by saying things like “Don’t worry about it. It’s no big deal.” may actually interfere with our ability to forgive in an authentic way. Slow down! Allow yourself to feel the things that you’re feeling. And don’t allow people who’ve hurt you to rush you.

In the second message, “What’s My End Game?”, we take some time to think about the different ways that we approach reconciliation. Do we want to be “right,” or do we want to be “reconciled” with those who have hurt us – and how is that going to affect the way that we approach them during difficult times? When we’re struggling in a relationship, do we search for people who can offer balanced perspectives, or do we search for a like-minded army of people who will simply support our position? Forgiveness and the type of reconciliation that Christ wants to bring into our lives when times are tough emerge as we speak with others in honest and authentic ways. And the great promise of Christ is that He’s going to be with us as we are working through challenges in our relationships. Sin separates, but the work of God in Jesus Christ continues to heal and to bring people together.

In the third message, “Too Big to Forgive?”, we address one of the most difficult parts of forgiveness. I suspect that we’ve all asked ourselves, “How do I know when the sin that someone has committed is too big for me to forgive?” At some point in life, we may have also asked ourselves, “How do I know when someone has hurt me too many times?” Our gift of forgiveness does not permit others to continue to hurt us. We may need to learn to walk away from relationships that are abusive and that continue to be filled with pain. But, even if we decide to do that, we still need to learn how to handle the “gunk” that’s left inside of us, don’t we? Sometimes, we may need to learn how to release little things; and, sometimes, the things that we will need to release may be huge! What can we learn as we continue to pray the words of the Lord’s Prayer: “forgive us our sins as we forgive those who sin against us?” Genuine forgiveness is always going to be tough because it always involves forgiving things the were both real and hurtful. But, forgiveness – real and genuine forgiveness – is what continues to open our lives to peace with God and to healthy relationships with other people.

 

 

Read Through the Bible – Weeks 15/16

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Welcome back to “Read Through the Bible”

But this command I gave them: ‘Obey my voice, and I will be your God, and you shall be my people. And walk in all the ways I command you, that it may be well with you.’ But they did not obey or incline their ears, but they walked in their own counsels and the stubbornness of their evil hearts, and went backward and not forward.” ~ Jeremiah 7:23-24

I suspect that we’ve all had times when we’ve lived in the way that God commanded us to live, and I suspect that we’ve all had times when we drifted off course. We read and digest God’s Word, and we pray for God’s guidance and direction. We have times when we drift away from God because we don’t listen, because we walk in our counsels, and because we can even be drawn off course by our own stubbornness and rebellion. But how do we get back on course and find “peace with God” after we’ve gone astray?

Many people believe that “peace with God” is achieved by returning to obedience. We’ve been told that we’re supposed to confess our sins, repent and change course. Even God’s Word tells us: when we confess our sins, God is faithful and just and will forgive our sins. (1 John 1:9) But if we seek “peace with God” by trying to live in the right way, how can we know when we’ve done enough? If “Judgment Day” is a day when we’re going to stand in front of a great, big scale in the sky with all of our “good deeds” placed on one side of the scale and all of our “bad deeds” placed on the other of the scale, how can we know – with 100% certainty – that the scale’s going to tip in the right direction?

St. Paul struggled with that idea as he was making sense of what it means to be baptized into the life, death and resurrection of Jesus.  St. Paul made some big mistakes along the way, and he was present at the stoning of Steven. (Acts 7:54-60)  Paul was severely and continuously criticized throughout his ministry because he persecuted the early Church. (Galatians 1:13) Centuries later, the German reformer, Martin Luther, struggled with the same issue – “How can I ever be ‘good’ enough to find peace with God?” And that question is what, ultimately, led Luther to post his 95 Theses on the doors of the Castle Church.

When we’re not perfect and when we make mistakes (even when we’re trying our best to do differently), how do we find “peace with God”?

St. Paul’s answer is simple: “For freedom Christ has set us free; stand firm therefore, and do not submit again to the yoke of slavery.” (Galatians 5:1) “For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God and are made right by God’s grace as a gift through redemption that is in Christ Jesus.” (Romans 3:23)

“Peace with God” comes through a relationship with Jesus Christ. “Peace with God” isn’t found by somehow returning to obedience and by find a way to “get it right” this time. We find “peace with God” when we discover that we’re the recipients of a gift from the hands of God that comes to us through the life, death, and resurrection of Jesus Christ!

And now, here are your readings for the next two weeks:

Week 15

Sunday: 1 Corinthians 13-14 – Monday: Exodus 5-8 – Tuesday: 1 Samuel 21-25 – Wednesday: Psalms 42-44 – Thursday: Job 29-30 – Friday: Jeremiah: 12-16 – Saturday: Mark 9-10

Week 16

Sunday: 1 Corinthians 15-16 – Monday: Exodus 9-12 – Tuesday: 1 Samuel 26-31 – Wednesday: Psalms 45-47 – Thursday: Job 31-32 – Friday: Jeremiah 17-21 – Saturday: Mark 11-12

Blessings!