When Grief and Easter Collide

Posted on April 3, 2018 by Wayne Gillespie

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I shared the news of my father’s death with you three weeks ago.

My 95-year-old Dad’s health began to change rather quickly right after Christmas. We did our best to navigate through the ups-and-downs, and we put our heads together and we figured-out what to do every time life threw us another curve. But three weeks ago, right in the middle of Lent, everything took a sudden and dramatic turn for the worse and my father died. I shared my tribute with you on the next day: “When Your Dad Dies”

The days that followed my Dad’s death were both busy and numbing. We needed to call the funeral home and give them some time to prepare my Dad’s body for the visitation. My sisters and I hosted a short visitation three days after our father died; and then, we had a short service, and a private burial on a cold and bitter afternoon. My Dad’s body was lowered into the ground right after I performed a short committal at the cemetery; and, right after that, my family and I faced what I’d call a “pregnant moment.” There’s that “pregnant moment” of silence when you’re standing at the edge of a grave and you realize that there’s nothing else that you can do. And, as much as you’d like to stay there a little longer, you know in your heart that it’s time to walk away. And then, you hop into your car and just drive….

One of the things that I’ve learned through all of this is that when people that we love fall into a raging river there’s not a whole lot that we can do. And so, I returned to work and continued to prepare for Easter. I wrote a short sermon about love for Maundy Thursday. I prepared a short series of meditations focused upon the “Stations of the Cross” for Good Friday and used those meditations to share some things I have learned about care-giving, compassion, forgiveness, and facing the moment of a loved-one’s death as I’ve shared my Dad’s final journey with him. But, I was still left in that “pregnant moment” where we all find ourselves right after we bury someone that we’ve loved and need to walk away. And then, right in the middle of Holy Week, it hit me….

This year’s Easter message, “When Grief and Easter Collide”, moves to the very core of hope in the Sacred Story that we share. Shortly after Jesus rode into Jerusalem on Palm Sunday, the very people who had shouted “Hosanna!” decided that He needed to die. In just a few short days, a man who appeared to be doing quite well was arrested and was put on trial. A man, who appeared to be doing quite well just a few days earlier, was swept into a raging river that led to a savage beating, crucifixion, and bloody death. And then, just a short time after Jesus died, His body was removed from the Cross and it was prepared for burial. The opening of the cold, dark Tomb was sealed as Jesus’ family and closest friends stood there in silence. And then they (just like myself and other members of my Dad’s remaining family) needed to walk away.

But, the Sacred Story tells us that the “pregnant moment” that occurs after someone is sealed in a grave isn’t the end. The women returned to the Tomb and discovered that the stone has been rolled away. A man dressed in dazzling white told them that Jesus – who once was dead – had been raised to new life. And in that moment, the Sacred Story takes us to that critical moment in life when faith and harsh realities collide. The Sacred Story is one that speaks a word of hope and peace “When Grief and Easter Collide.”

My journey from the sadness of Good Friday to the joyous celebration of Easter this year has, once again, reminded me that God takes care of us no matter what we face in life or in death. The Sacred Story has taught me that, sometimes, we need to slow down because God’s power can be experienced in new ways during pregnant moments filled with pain and loneliness. The Sacred Story that tells us about a glorious Day when God will wipe every tear from our eyes drew me to a place – to the Church – where people supported me and surrounded me and sang songs of great hope and faith that I’m not ready to sing yet. The Sacred Story drew me to a place – to the gathering of God’s faithful people – where I was reminded that I’m going to see my Dad again – in a place where we’re not going to have to worry about life throwing us curves, and in a place where we’ll finally find the peace and rest that we crave.

Easter is a special moment in time when life and eternity collide. Easter is a glorious day when we remember that when the raging waters of life sweep people that we love away from us, it’s not the end of the story!

Christ is risen! An empty Tomb bears witness to the fact that our tombs – and the tombs of the people that we love and have loved – will be empty someday, too. “When Grief and Easter Collide”, death and decay are swallowed-up in the victory of Christ!

The Great Liturgy of my brothers and sisters in the Orthodox tradition announces:

“Tonight, Hell groans: ‘My power has vanished. I received One who died as mortals die, but I could not hold Him. With Him and through Him, I lost those over which I ruled. I had held control over the dead since the world began; and lo, He raises them all up with Him to shine in glory.”

Christ is Risen! Alleluia!

Be Real!

Posted on July 3, 2017 by Wayne Gillespie

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I sometimes wish that I had the words to make things better.

I don’t always know what to say to parents who have just lost a child, or to a friend who just learned that he/she has cancer. I remember standing in a long line in a gymnasium, several years ago, wondering what I was going to say when it was my turn to speak with a mother whose son had been killed in Afghanistan. I’ve heard Christians try to comfort others with the words: “God will never give you more than you can bear.” Many people who came to offer their support after my mother died talked about how “good” my Mom looked as she was lying in her casket.

I sometimes wish that I had the words to make things better; but, when it all boils down, I know that I can’t fix everything by sprinkling some “magic fairy dust” from my lips.

In this week’s message, “Be Real!”, we meet a false prophet named Hananiah who spoke to God’s people during an incredibly difficult time. King Nebuchadnezzar of Babylon had invaded the land of Judah and had scorched the earth with fire. Nebuchadnezzar had destroyed homes, uprooted families, and carried people away as slaves. And, when the false prophet Hananiah speaks, I can almost hear him say: “Don’t worry! Just relax! God’s going to make things better before you know it! It’s always darkest before the dawn!”

I sometimes wish that I had the words to make things better – and I’m sure that you feel the same way. It’s not easy to sit down and spend time with people who are grieving, or to talk with teenagers who are being bullied. It’s not easy to talk with parents whose kids are being consumed by opioids, with people who don’t have a place to call a home, with people who are struggling with a mental illness, or with people who are being abused in their own homes.

When God calls people to prayer and to the embracing of Christ’s Great Commission, God sends people into dark, scary places. And it’s not easy to remain “real” and “authentic” on the front lines of ministry because it’s not comfortable and because we don’t always have the words that we need to make things better.

And yet, as we learn to move past unhelpful platitudes and shallow statements that we have created to make ourselves feel better, we become open to “real connections” and “real relationships.” Christ journeys with us. God opens doors. The Holy Spirit even puts words into our mouths!

It’s not easy to be real and authentic. It’s not easy to admit that we don’t have words that can make difficult situations better. But, as we struggle to be both real and authentic, we find ourselves speaking God’s word in powerful ways. “Be Real!” Be a man or woman of faith who’s not afraid to simply “be present” during difficult times; because, when you do that, God will use you in incredible ways to pierce darkness with His own brilliant light!

Blessings!

Have you ever asked God, “WHY?”

Posted on April 3, 2017 by Wayne Gillespie

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We all face times when our faith is shaken to the core.

On some level, we expect to be blessed with good health and with healthy children when we follow God. We, often, spend time in prayer when we’re facing difficult times or when we want God to heal our bodies (or the bodies of people we know and love). Deep inside, we might believe that it’s God’s “job” to ride onto the scene and make things better when life’ tough, and we might even be disappointed when God doesn’t do what we expect God to do. Have you ever asked God, “WHY?”

In this week’s message, “Have you ever asked God, ‘WHY?'”, we explore one of the most intriguing stories in the Bible. We read about Lazarus, a man who was ill and we read about a man whose sisters hoped Jesus would save the day. We read about a man who died, and about two sisters who uttered some of the most haunting words in the Bible: “Lord, if you had been here, my brother would not have died.”

I suspect that we’ve all said those words in difficult times. We’ve probably all had times when we’ve shaken our fists at the sky and when we’ve pounded on the silent gates of Heaven. But, no matter how many times we ask the question “Why?” – we don’t get an answer, do we? No matter how many times we want to hear the voice from Heaven, it doesn’t come.

And Jesus knows that….

And, perhaps, when Mary and Martha ask Jesus their unanswerable question, that’s why He begins to talk with them about “What’s next?” What does it mean when Jesus tells us that struggles and illnesses and death are not going to be the end of our story? How can we find strength and courage to move through times in life when things are falling apart and when life’s not fair – by remembering that God’s still at work and that God continues to have the power to re-create and give the gift of new life?

We CAN find peace and hope in life – even when the specific details in our lives are not what we want them to be. Do not be afraid! Even though I don’t know where life’s going to take you and what kinds of challenges you’re going to face – I do know that, when it’s all said and done, you’re going to be OK.

“I am the Resurrection and the Life,” Jesus says, and the Day shall surely come when all of your “Why?-s” and “Why didn’t you?-s” will fade away. The Day is surely coming when all the great unanswered questions we have about life and death are going to pass away – and, in that Great Moment, we’ll be swept-up into the arms of the Lord who loves us and we’ll actually see God face-to-face!

Blessings!